Check Yourself: Being Called Out by the Tarot

I wanted to share my tarot reading I did this morning which ended up being a perfect example of being called out by the Tarot.

Let me begin by divulging a meditation I experienced the other day. During my meditation, I sat with my guide who had a fire going. He asked me to throw three scrolls into the fire. Each scroll had a word written on it – Judgement, Anger, and Self-Importance. I threw the scrolls into the fire and my guide gently reminded me to keep my ego in check.

For my reading this morning (as part of the #7daysoulfullifetarotchallenge) I asked, “What is my soul’s path right now?” I drew the King of Pentacles reversed, which has made an appearance a few times over the past few weeks. I then drew a couple two more cards to get a clearer picture – the King of Swords reversed and the Knight of Swords reversed. I then pulled from the Animal Spirit Deck the Crow as my path (which I also drew yesterday) and the Butterfly as my obstacle.

The Linestrider Tarot and The Wild Unknown Animal Spirit Deck

The Linestrider Tarot and The Wild Unknown Animal Spirit Deck

The reversed Kings and Knight warn me to avoid a superior attitude, to watch my temper, and make decisions with a cool head. They also warn against being impulsive and arguing over injustices with a hot head. Sounds very much like my meditation, doesn’t it? The Crow tells me my path is to be spiritually strong, balanced, and have a clear psychic mind. The Butterfly tells me my obstacle is one of transformation. I must be patient and kind during this great transition without becoming fragile and frustrated.

I can imagine the look on my guide’s face resembles something like the smug I-told-you-so look on the Willy Wonka’s face – but in a more loving way. It is sometimes hard to keep my ego in check when my tarot reading is shining a spotlight on the more negative aspects of myself, but then I sigh and say, “Yeah, you’re right.”

Being called out your tarot cards is a very sobering experience and one you need to look at in a loving way. There’s no need to try to find only the positive and there’s also no need to get defensive. The great thing about the Tarot is that it offers you insight and then leaves it up to you to decide what to do with that insight. Will you continue on your current path or make the changes necessary to achieve a different outcome?

Lesson From My Spirit Guides

This morning I drew my 2-card spread (path/obstacle) from the The Wild Unknown Animal Spirit Deck for the week. I drew Dragonfly for my path and Scorpion for my obstacle. I smiled as the Dragonfly appeared because in my 3-card spread (who I was/who I am/who I will be) on the New Moon, I drew Dragonfly for “who I will be”. The Dragonfly and Scorpion gave me the message that only through forgiveness and being honest with my feelings will I be able to see clearly and master my own mind. I placed the cards on my altar, as I usually do, so that I could reflect on them throughout the day.

Dragonfly and Scorpion

The funny thing with my spirit guides is that when they really want me to hear a message loud and clear, they will drive the point home. Today was one of those days. My son and I decided to spend the hot afternoon playing in the creek at my parents’ house. Within five minutes of being in the creek, a crawdad (or crayfish/crawfish) came walking up to me. A laugh erupted from my mouth and my son asked me, “What, Mama?” I bent down and picked up the crawdad and looked at him. My immediate thought upon seeing the crawdad was how he resembled a scorpion – he was at least the closest thing resembling a scorpion where we live in the world. I thanked him and placed him back in the water.


*No crawdads were harmed in the taking of these photos

Shortly after that my son and I got into a kayak and paddled up and down the creek. A large blue dragonfly became our companion while we were on the water. She darted above us, beside us, and even hovered in front of us. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face.


Once we were back on land we decided to grab some rocks from the floor of the creek to throw into the water. As I reached down, I noticed a smaller crawdad resting in shallow water where the creek brushed up against the earth. I haven’t seen any crawdads this year (and can’t recall seeing any last year), and now in the span of two hours I had two find me.


Let me say that I don’t think everything is a sign, but I know it’s a sign when my guides send me a message and then reiterate that message with a sign from nature (my guides are very nature-driven), or when I ask my guides to send me a specific kind of sign and they send me one. My intuition tells me that a sign is a sign.

At the end of the day after a trying evening I have come to understand the message. I must be honest with my feelings and forgive myself. Sometimes I allow myself to get sucked into having moments where I feel like a bad mom, a bad wife, a bad friend, etc. But I’m not. I am greater than the sum of these less-than-stellar moments. I must sit with the fact that I feel badly for how I reacted or behaved in a given situation, forgive myself, and then let it go. Breathe it away and enjoy the joy and magic that the Dragonfly brings.

New Moon Calling

I love the way my body and mind buzzes with the energy of the new moon. Ideas and inspiration bubble to the surface and I tingle with creativity. I use the energy of new moons as a fresh start and a time to set new intentions. This new moon felt a little different as it approached. I realized that I wasn’t truly allowing myself to be open to receiving what the Universe was trying to send to me and I was letting fear get in the way of manifesting my intentions. Immediately after this aha moment, I made an affirmation and placed it in my sacred space so that I would remember to say it several times a day. I can already see the effects of opening myself up to receiving.

What intentions can you set during this new moon? What decisions can you make to move past any crossroads? Let go of any fear and make them happen.

Artwork by Elspeth McLean

Artwork by Elspeth McLean

Finding My Mama Bliss

In February I experienced my first women’s retreat exclusively for mamas. I really had no idea what to expect going into it and would be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous. I’m a hermit by nature and my heart raced at the thought of spending a whole weekend with people I didn’t know that well and most I didn’t know at all. The fear was for nought, for that weekend I dove into my soul alongside a roomful of amazing women. I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing as I allowed myself to be vulnerable and expose hidden truths that I didn’t even know were there. It was the most emotionally exhausting weekend of my life, but it was also what I needed to happen at that point in my life; to break open my soul and explore the emotions that I didn’t know I had been avoiding for so long because I had thought it was easier to bury them rather than work through them.

I left the retreat feeling like a new butterfly fresh out of her cocoon just learning to spread her wings again. I also left feeling a connection – a feeling of sisterhood – with each and every one of the woman I had met that weekend. Upon leaving, I immediately knew I had to attend the next retreat, so I signed up then and there.


Fast forward to this past weekend. The day I left for this retreat I asked my guides what message I should focus on for the weekend ahead. As I was shuffling the cards, The Lovers literally jumped out of the deck. I drew an additional two cards – Judgment and the Page of Wands. The message I received from my reading was one about self-love, transformation, and a new phase of life. The weekend did not disappoint.

moon on the water

When I arrived at the retreat I wasn’t nervous at all and instead I was filled with excitement for what was ahead. When I shared sacred space with these women again for the first time this weekend, I noticed a shift that had taken place within me. I could feel that I wasn’t the same person that had walked in at that first retreat just a few months prior. I could feel this self-confidence that had emerged from truly embracing myself and not caring what others thought of me. I could feel the calm created from the ongoing work of taking the time to process my emotions. I felt more at peace and more connected with myself. I hadn’t fully realized how much of a transformation I had already made on a spiritual and emotional level.

full moon

One of the most powerful moments of the weekend for me was doing the labyrinth walk. We had a short hike up to the labyrinth which waited for us in a clearing. The winding path laid out using rocks was a magical sight. When I stepped into the labyrinth and walked my way through a meditative state, I was overcome by the energy and connection I had with the earth beneath my feet and the women walking the path around me. It was overwhelming, powerful, and unexpected. It’s something that I’ll never forget.

labyrinth 2

I ended the weekend with a better understanding of my journey. It was a weekend of acceptance and letting go of any fear I may have about what lies on the path ahead me. I left finding reassurance within myself that I am heading in the right direction and I have the answers I need – I only need to listen. I also left overwhelmed with gratitude for the sisterhood that is Mama Bliss.

Dream Body Art

Cord Cutting and Letting Go

A couple of months ago I was guided through the process of cord cutting – cutting the energetic cord that links us to another person or memory – after being plagued by a memory that had surfaced in a dream. These vague emotions attached to the memory had no space in my present life. After I had cut the cord with this memory, I was released from its hold and was able to let any lingering feelings attached to that memory fade away.

A month later I realized that I had a lot of cord cutting that needed to be done. While meditating, I gathered a whole room of people and memories that were energetically tethered to me. One by one, I asked each person’s permission to cut the cord that tied us together and listened for their answer. Only one or two were hesitant but agreed after something as simple as a hug. I could feel the cords dissolving away and finished the meditation feeling much lighter.

I thought after all of that energetic decluttering that I wouldn’t need to do anymore cord cutting for a while. However, last night I found myself in a dream with an acquaintance from long ago. We were sitting together on a brown leather ottoman bench seat by a window in a room filled with many people that I knew at that time. It resembled some sort of small-scale school reunion. She and I exchanged pleasantries and then she began telling me how much I hurt her all those years ago. As she was talking I realized that I had almost no recollection of the memories she was sharing with me. She confided in me that these memories still bothered her after all these years later.

In the dream I recognized that we needed to cut cords. We found ourselves standing in an empty space and I asked her if she would agree to cutting the cord, but she shook her head no, clutching to the cord that tied us together. I gave her a hug and said, “I’m sorry I was such an asshole. Do you forgive me?” After a moment she nodded and the cord fell from her hands. I cut the cord and as we watched it dissolve, the image of the dream faded away. I awoke this morning with a sense of healing and lightness, and I hope that this person from my past feels it as well.

IMG_1858 (1)

If you are interested in learning more about how to cut cords, there are many guided meditations and articles out there to help you do so. Many people will have a different style of cord cutting. For example, Doreen Virtue uses the assistance of Archangel Michael. Find a meditation that feels right for you and see what arises for you.

Venturing into a Soul-Based Business


A couple of months ago I was listening to a teleclass called Birth Your Soul Based Business. This class unearthed a seed that had been buried within my soul for a long time. This seed began to take root and grow as I brainstormed ideas about the what and why of my business. By the end of the week I had several pages of notes in my hands and realized, “I’m actually going to do this.”

Charmed Intentions

With my husband’s support, I purchased supplies and began creating my products. In between creating, I researched how to take good product pictures, about search engine optimization (enough to make me not want to read anything about SEO again), created social media accounts for my shop, and a logo and business cards. That first month before opening my shop and the two weeks that followed were a lot of work. Once I got to the point where I was opening my shop,  I was excited but also slightly apprehensive. By announcing to the world that I had opened my own shop  where I sell charmed goods, I was also saying to the world, “This is who I am. This is what I love. This is what I’m passionate about.” But I discovered after sharing my shop with my friends and the world that it was very freeing and I didn’t care what people thought. To my surprise, everyone responded positively to my authenticity and were very supportive.

So what exactly is my business? Charmed Intentions is my Etsy shop where I sell charmed items that are programmed and charged (meaning I state the intention and let that energy infuse into them) to help people manifest their intentions and desires. I currently have charm bags and charm bottle necklaces for sale. I use a mixture of herbs and selected crystals that have properties associated with the given intention. I smudge (cleanse by running the items through burning sage) all of the materials and take care to assemble items according to the phase of the moon that will enhance the magic in them; they are then charged under the full or new moon. I love working with herbs and crystals so it is such a phenomenal feeling to use them to create products for others.

Courage Charm Bag

Courage Charm Bag

Divination Charm Bag

Divination Charm Bag

I have come a long way since opening my shop. That small seed from the beginning has blossomed into something beautiful. Through this process I have gained more self-confidence and more self-love simply by being open with others about an important, huge part of myself. I love thinking of new items to create, taking photos for my shop’s Instagram account, and sharing magic with others. I’m looking forward to seeing where my shop goes from here.

Charm Bottle NecklacesIf you’d like to learn more about my products, stop by Charmed Intentions! You can also follow my shop on Facebook, Instagram, and Tumblr for updates as well as magical tidbits.





Soul Art Day

Yesterday I took part in Soul Art Day – a guided journey to connect with your spirit through creativity and art. This was my first time hearing about Soul Art Day so I wasn’t quite sure what to expect.

I began my morning by working through the exercises from the Guided Soul Art Journey. I began my journey by setting an intention which ended up being “I am connected with my family and with nature”.

The last exercise before beginning my art was writing a story in two minutes using stream of consciousness. The story had to include the five words I had chosen from the exercise prior – the fifth word had to the title and the other four words had to be used within the story. The title of my story ended up being Connection and the four words I had to use were Soulful, Ethereal, Powerful, and Serene. The story I came up with was, “The powerful dragon stood atop the mountain looking over the serene forest that lay below. He felt the soulful warmth of the sun beaming down on him. He heard the sound of water rushing somewhere nearby, cascading in a waterfall that created an ethereal mist over the side of the mountain.”

The next step was creating art. The caveat was that I had to incorporate my story in some way, as well as use a body part (or parts) that I had traced in an exercise at the beginning. I had traced both of my feet together on poster board and used this as my template. I went the collage route and sifted through several magazines finding images within the pages that spoke to me. One thing that I find true with any creative outlet is that once I get started, the creative energy takes hold and flows through me and I have a hard time stepping away until I’m done.

Here is my finished piece:

soul art

Once I was finished, the next step was to answer some questions to gather insight about my art. I described my art as very nature-driven with all of the four elements (air, water, earth, fire) present. I felt that my art was interesting with little surprises.

The most powerful insight I received from my art was when I asked it, “What do you want to tell me?” I received the message: You are a magical being who is strong and capable of scaling mountains. Keep your feet grounded in the earth. Let your light glow from within and light up the world.

I then asked my art what it wanted to tell me about my intention. I received the message, “Nature is all around you. All you have to do is step outside and take notice.” Reflecting on my intention, I also received the insight that the only thing standing my way is myself.

If you are interested in learning more about Soul Art Day or creating your own Soul Art, click here. You do not have to have any artistic experience to create art. Just let your intuition guide you and you will be surprised what messages you unlock in the process.

Paying the Ferryman: Release Day!

Heidi Lane

Today is release day! What is Paying the Ferryman? It’s an anthology of 20 short stories that take place after the death of the main character and explores what happens in the afterlife. Death is just the beginning…

Paying the Ferryman is now available in both paperback and for Kindle. If you already bought it in paperback but want it for your Kindle as well, Kindle MatchBook gives the Kindle version to you for just 99 cents! Buy it now! Have a Nook? You can buy the Nook version right here.

Look for my story, “Eternity”, along with the other 19 fear-inducing stories. It’s the perfect book to cuddle up with on the nights leading up to Halloween. Or buy multiple copies and hand them out to your friends for Halloween or Samhain gifts.

And remember, if you like winning things you won’t want to miss out on the

View original post 24 more words

Announcement: Paying the Ferryman Release Date!

It has always been a dream of mine to be published and now that dream is finally here! I’m so excited to share my first published piece of work with you all. Look for my short story, “Eternity”, available now in Paying the Ferryman!

Heidi Lane

I am beyond excited to announce that Paying the Ferryman will be released October 20th! The anthology will feature my story among 19 others. The stories all begin after the death of the main character and what happens in the afterlife. Be sure to mark your calendars and grab this book just in time for Halloween!

Paying the Ferryman

View original post

Confession Time: Embrace Your Weird

I’m feeling inspired to make a confession this morning. A confession that I’m sure many people can relate to. For most of my life I didn’t know who I was; not really anyway. I wasn’t true to myself; I was self-conscious, riddled with self-doubt, and I’d change my colors to feel liked, wanted, and to make people think I had my sh*t together. Surprise! I most definitely did not have my sh*t together.

I spent much of my life thinking that there was something wrong with me. I had a giant wall up and did not let anyone through. I had no self-esteem to speak of. In my relationships I was usually the one to initiate the breakup because I couldn’t handle the thought of them breaking up with me and feeling rejected. On some subconscious level I was basically screaming, “Love me so I don’t have to love myself!” I thought I was never good enough and that I didn’t deserve the good things in life.

I was a chronic worrier and had social anxiety that I tried to suppress by being someone I wasn’t. At some point in elementary school I suffered from panic attacks which left me lying awake at night. In high school I was depressed and lived an apathetic life. Following high school I fell into some self-destructive behaviors and did what I wanted without caring whether it hurt someone else. (It was easy for me to emotionally disconnect since I was depressed).

After one particular incident when I was 20, I decided I really needed to figure myself out. Shortly after that I met my future husband. I felt at ease with him and realized that I didn’t have to pretend to be anyone but me. I let my wall down and he thought I was awesome just the way I was. It took a while to peel away these layers that had accumulated over the years to get to the true me. Once I found the true me, standing naked and vulnerable for me to look at, I realized, Hey, I am awesome.

This brings me to “Embrace Your Weird”. Felicia Day recently released a book You’re Never Weird on the Internet (Almost) and it really resonated with me. There were some parts that felt so familiar to me that I actually cried. She recently had a campaign called Embrace Your Weird to raise awareness and funds for the non-profit Stomp Out Bullying which is an anti-cyberbullying charity. Embrace Your Weird is totally my slogan for life. These days I still have some social anxiety and dread new situations, but I can confidently say that if someone doesn’t like me for who I am or thinks I’m weird because of one thing or another, I honestly don’t care. I’m not a conventional person in any sense of the word. “Traditional” and “normal” are never words that I would use to describe myself. Now that I have a healthy self-esteem, have self-worth, and self-confidence, “fitting in” is not on my agenda. If someone is offended by me or thinks I should change, then they can kindly take their leave because I don’t have the time and energy to feed into that negativity. Life is too short.


I say all of this to get to this point here at the end. As a mom of a 2.5-year-old, I want him to grow up with the message “embrace your weird”. I want him to know that his parents will love and support him no matter how “weird” he is. I want him to be able to come to us and talk to us when other kids are not as accepting, and I want him to feel confident enough in himself to not be terribly bothered by not being accepted by everyone. Most of all, I want him to love himself and know that he isn’t necessarily “weird” at all, but that he’s a totally awesome human being.

As the great Addams Family once said, “Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.”