In February I experienced my first women’s retreat exclusively for mamas. I really had no idea what to expect going into it and would be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous. I’m a hermit by nature and my heart raced at the thought of spending a whole weekend with people I didn’t know that well and most I didn’t know at all. The fear was for nought, for that weekend I dove into my soul alongside a roomful of amazing women. I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing as I allowed myself to be vulnerable and expose hidden truths that I didn’t even know were there. It was the most emotionally exhausting weekend of my life, but it was also what I needed to happen at that point in my life; to break open my soul and explore the emotions that I didn’t know I had been avoiding for so long because I had thought it was easier to bury them rather than work through them.
I left the retreat feeling like a new butterfly fresh out of her cocoon just learning to spread her wings again. I also left feeling a connection – a feeling of sisterhood – with each and every one of the woman I had met that weekend. Upon leaving, I immediately knew I had to attend the next retreat, so I signed up then and there.
Fast forward to this past weekend. The day I left for this retreat I asked my guides what message I should focus on for the weekend ahead. As I was shuffling the cards, The Lovers literally jumped out of the deck. I drew an additional two cards – Judgment and the Page of Wands. The message I received from my reading was one about self-love, transformation, and a new phase of life. The weekend did not disappoint.
When I arrived at the retreat I wasn’t nervous at all and instead I was filled with excitement for what was ahead. When I shared sacred space with these women again for the first time this weekend, I noticed a shift that had taken place within me. I could feel that I wasn’t the same person that had walked in at that first retreat just a few months prior. I could feel this self-confidence that had emerged from truly embracing myself and not caring what others thought of me. I could feel the calm created from the ongoing work of taking the time to process my emotions. I felt more at peace and more connected with myself. I hadn’t fully realized how much of a transformation I had already made on a spiritual and emotional level.
One of the most powerful moments of the weekend for me was doing the labyrinth walk. We had a short hike up to the labyrinth which waited for us in a clearing. The winding path laid out using rocks was a magical sight. When I stepped into the labyrinth and walked my way through a meditative state, I was overcome by the energy and connection I had with the earth beneath my feet and the women walking the path around me. It was overwhelming, powerful, and unexpected. It’s something that I’ll never forget.
I ended the weekend with a better understanding of my journey. It was a weekend of acceptance and letting go of any fear I may have about what lies on the path ahead me. I left finding reassurance within myself that I am heading in the right direction and I have the answers I need – I only need to listen. I also left overwhelmed with gratitude for the sisterhood that is Mama Bliss.
Nurturing from Within 